


Eleutheromania

by evaman69



Category: IT (1990), IT (Movies - Muschietti), IT - Stephen King
Genre: Alternate Universe - No Pennywise (IT), Angst with a Happy Ending, Eventual Fluff, Gen, Hurt/Comfort, Its not that sad, Losers Club (IT) Friendship, References to Depression, Stanley Uris Has OCD, Stanley Uris Needs a Hug, Tags May Change, Teenage Losers Club (IT), They/Them Pronouns for Stanley Uris, Work In Progress, for the pennywise hoes and it promo gc ily guys, i cried while writing and editing this, its gets happier i swear, stan is the main character cause i said so, this is just me projecting onto stan uris
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-11-08
Updated: 2020-11-09
Packaged: 2021-03-08 22:34:50
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,109
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27460540
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/evaman69/pseuds/evaman69
Summary: Stan is tired. Tired of life and tired of being told to be happy. Every night they dream of getting up the courage to just leave Derry behind. To become free. Maybe once Stan meets the rest of the Loser's Club, they'll all find the courage within each other to make a better life for themselves. One where happiness comes as naturally as the smiles they where when they're with each other.
Relationships: Ben Hanscom & Stanley Uris, Eddie Kaspbrak/Richie Tozier, Richie Tozier & Stanley Uris, Stanley Uris & Everyone
Comments: 1
Kudos: 2





	Eleutheromania

**Author's Note:**

> hi so this is my first fic for the it fandom ive ever written!! its also the first time ive ever posted my writing publicly so im rlly excited :D this was supposed to b an SMAU but i didnt have the time and didnt rlly want to write modern losers club so here we r. if ur from my twt ilysm and thank u for reading :) if ur not from my twitter u should go follow me!! @evaman69, where u can find me screaming abt tua, hp and it. i hope u like it and feedback is greatly appreciated!!

Stan looked out their window at the beginnings of a thunderstorm brewing in the evening sky. They always liked the sound of rain pattering against windows, thunder seemingly shaking the whole atmosphere. For some reason they believed that thunderstorms signified good luck, so whenever they saw the bright blue above turn that deep shade of indigo, Stan couldn’t help but smile. There was always something so calming in storms; something they never quite understood but were always appreciative of. Maybe it was the peace that came with them, the emptiness of the streets and Stan’s own mind as a result. Maybe it was the soft boom that could be heard through any walls, no matter how thick. Showing that nature will always be stronger than we could even imagine.

Leaning back on their windowsill and pulling their legs up with them, they thought once again of their desire to just run outside into the pouring rain and leave. Become a hitchhiker or a busker or maybe just wander around aimlessly until one day they drop. As depressing as that might sound, there was nothing Stan wanted more in the world.

It wasn’t exactly as if Stan’s life was terrible. It wasn’t exactly amazing either, but most people would consider them lucky. They have a house and good food, they’re middle class in a nice neighbourhood. That’s more than enough. And Stan knows this, of course they do, being constantly reminded to just be content, just be happy with what they do have, just be happy they’re not worse off. But it’s easier said than done. Stan wishes they could be happy, they really do! It just always feels like something is wrong, something is missing, something bad is going to happen, something is out of place. Their mind is constantly plagued with these thoughts and they only seem to become harder and harder to deal with. But, as usual, Stan reminds themself there’s nothing to worry about, they just need to be happy. And so, Stan closes their eyes and leans their head back against the wall behind them. Praying that God will let them wake up happy. Praying that God will let them wake up normal.

Stan decides to sit there a bit longer, listening to the sounds of the storm. They aren’t sure how much longer, but it doesn’t really matter since the summer has already begun. Stan loves summer, the end of school, nice weather, the only time of year they can truly do whatever they want. It sometimes makes them sad to think about how they barely have any left, only two more summers until Stan is off to college and the workforce. They dread growing up with a passion, each birthday being like a clock slowly ticking down until their life becomes insignificant. Not that it was ever greatly important in the first place, but this way Stan still has time to make it something worth living. Of course, they don’t have any interest in becoming rich or famous or some kind of genius; but it’d be nice to live a life you can be proud of. A life with no regrets. Stan wishes so badly they could let themself be free. Become who they want to be. Not that they have any idea who that even is.

The rain begins falling in sheets and as much as Stan knows they should get ready for bed; they can’t bring themself to move from the spot they’re nestled into in the corner of the windowsill. They see a man quickly walk down the dimly lit street, a black umbrella in hand. Stan sees the man cross the street and walks over to house 83, unlocking the navy-blue door with one hand, trying to keep the umbrella still over his head to avoid getting wet. Stan recognizes him as Mr. Dolphy. A kind, young English teacher who teaches the eighth graders at Derry Junior High. Stan never had him as he only moved to Derry last year, but they always found him to be nice. Though Stan had always hated the house he lived in. Something about the number 83 just made them feel uneasy; they always had to cross to the other side of the street by their own house when they were passing it.

As Mr. Dolphy stepped inside his small suburban house, Stan closed their eyes again. They weren’t tired yet, but it wasn’t too late anyway. The gentle rumbles coming from the sky gave Stan goosebumps as a heavy wind blew, pushing the chilled June air through the small cracks in the window to Stan’s left. They thought about how cold it gets in the winter and how they always wanted to move somewhere south. Somewhere with no snow, no cold weather, where the cracks in the windows wouldn’t matter and they would never have to think about Derry or Maine ever again. Maybe somewhere nice and accepting, though Stan wasn’t sure those places existed in the South. But they knew it wasn’t going to happen either way. Sometimes it’s nice to just dream, even if you know you’ll have to wake up soon.

The cool air seeping through the side of the window smelled distinctly like nighttime. There was no other way Stan could describe it. That familiar crisp evening air. They thought about opening their window but decided against it as the rain hadn’t faltered and they didn’t really want their whole room soaked. Stan’s eyes start to droop the longer they kept their head leaned back. They weren’t sure how long it’d been since they sat down but there were more stars out and drowsiness was starting to fill their head. Stan knew they needed to go to bed, otherwise they’d fall asleep on the windowsill and probably fall off at some point in the night. Dreadfully, they touched their toes back to the floor and stretched backwards for a few seconds, listening to their stiff joints popping from sitting in the same position for so long. After turning off the lamp sitting on their desk, Stan walked over to their firm double bed and plopped down face first. They flipped to their right side, then to their left, finally settling after turning back to the right again. Pulling the cotton covers over their waist and closing their drooping eyes.

Stan thought of running away as they drifted off to sleep. Going somewhere they could be free, somewhere they could be happy. Sleep overtook them after a few minutes, leaving Stan in the peace of their subconscious; the only time they were ever completely content.

-End of Chapter One-

**Author's Note:**

> hii!! i hoped u liked this chapter. im writing the second one rn so that will be up soon hopefully :) feedback is always appreciated, good or bad but hate will b deleted!! i cant say how long this fic is going to b but it will most likely b a long one. thanks for reading!!


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